monkeychimp.org

What's happening right now...

Wed, 27 Aug 2008 08:36:04 -0400

My coworkers are telling ridiculous stories about how they’ve been in minor fender-benders….and they survived because of ANGELS!

They are being completely serious.

The one coworker told a story about how she got rear-ended (in bumper-to-bumper traffic on 495) last year. I remember this because she literally cornered everyone in this office to describe the ordeal. In this most recent re-telling, she left out some important details from when it originally happened:

- like how she was at fault.

- like how she nearly got herself arrested after accusing the responding officer of taking a bribe from the person she hit.

- like how she was going maybe 15 miles an hour when the collision happened.

But now it’s a miracle and angels were involved! Yay!!!!

Plants - a set on Flickr

Sun, 24 Aug 2008 20:33:02 -0400

Plants - a set on Flickr: Tom and I are starting a little garden on our balcony. I’ll try to remember to chart their progress here. Maybe we’ll remember to take good care of them if the internet is watching.

WANT!!

Sat, 23 Aug 2008 16:11:09 -0400

WANT!!

CHECK IT OUT! Top-up-and-coming school! GMU is the jam!

Fri, 22 Aug 2008 17:45:12 -0400

CHECK IT OUT! Top-up-and-coming school!

GMU is the jam!

Smartphones: Presenting the Googlephone

Fri, 22 Aug 2008 15:39:09 -0400

Smartphones: Presenting the Googlephone: This is a good idea. If I still had a landline, I would probably own one of these.

I really wish everyone would just shut up right now.

Fri, 22 Aug 2008 11:54:59 -0400

I really wish everyone would just shut up right now.

Complaint #268

Wed, 20 Aug 2008 08:44:43 -0400

Oddly enough, I’ll express this exact frustration and then laugh at myself because it sounds like something that would be on White Whine.

whitewhine:

“Um, it’s Tuesday and the This American Life podcast hasn’t updated yet. Hellooooo?”

-Whine by Brian

"Don’t be too hard on your self. You have to do what you have to do. Take care of your self..."

Wed, 20 Aug 2008 08:25:00 -0400

“

Don’t be too hard on your self. You have to do what you have to do. Take care of your self first and remember to take it easy. Just think and keep the following slogan “WILL THIS MATTER IN FIVE YEARS?”

Talk to you soon and have a great day with your Mom!

”

- My coworker’s response to my “need PTO” email that I sent this morning. Honestly, in the close-to-five-years that I have worked for this company, this coworker has become like a brother.

Sometimes that office can be a nightmare of clashing personalities and vicious attitudes, so it’s nice to have someone around who will look out for you and be a true friend. I know some really nice people and I’m thankful for that every day.

You know what, Keebler? It would be amazing if you brought these...

Tue, 19 Aug 2008 11:28:26 -0400

You know what, Keebler? It would be amazing if you brought these back.

Phone call with my boss

Mon, 18 Aug 2008 13:01:42 -0400

Me: Hi
My Boss: Hey, did you know Chris Farley was working for us now?
Me: Do you mean the new guy?
My Boss: Yeah, he looks like a combination of Chris Farley and who was that guy in King Kong and School of Rock?
Me: Jack Black?
My Boss: That's it!

This was in response to an email that we out earlier today announcing the new hires. These emails are accompanied by the most unflattering, unattractive head shots of the new employees. I've always found the whole thing really unfair and borderline cruel. And while I DO think it's unkind to sit around on the phone with your boss and have conversations like the one above, these pictures sometimes leave you no choice.

A case of the Mondays.

Mon, 18 Aug 2008 12:40:21 -0400

Things that are not cool today:

- I had an upset tummy this morning, so I didn’t eat my yogurt. And because I forgot to put that yogurt in the fridge, I can’t eat it at all now.

- I’m scheduled to be in a super annoying meeting from 2:30 - 5:00. What a terrible time for a meeting. Technically, considering I got here a little before 7 and haven’t taken a lunch, I could leave at 3. However, I’m sure getting up to go home for the day only a half an hour after the start of the meeting would look really bad.

- In the last hour, a really nasty sinus headache has erupted in my skull. WHY??????

- This made me kind of upset. Tom and I met some humpback whales around this time last year. I wish CNN wouldn’t put sad animal stories on their front page.

I am seriously entertaining the idea of taking a sick day tomorrow.

This is just great. Frankie Jonas,...

Thu, 14 Aug 2008 10:40:15 -0400

This is just great. Frankie Jonas, FTW!

bonusjonas:

secretnap:

The Jonas Brothers are here! OMGWTFLOLZ (via minaka)

Not sure how this started, but there’s a hearty collection of graffiti on their tour vehicles. Good thing they’re not rentals…or are they?

I shot this photo on Sunday evening.

I wrote “There are 4 Brothers!” on the bus. Some girl wrote WHO CARES underneath it.

I don’t think any of my brothers noticed. Then I listened to Metallica on my iPod and played Nintendo DS.

Look, I stayed silent for the entire summer about this, but I...

Mon, 11 Aug 2008 07:23:00 -0400

Look, I stayed silent for the entire summer about this, but I can’t keep quiet anymore. I REALLY HATE THESE SUNGLASSES. What’s worse is that they also come in red and white. Hideous.

Lauren Conrad is public enemy number one in my book right now. Those stupid Ray Bans, that ugly shirt and black skinny jeans. STOP IT, LAUREN. You have done better.

Skittles was being pretty awesome this weekend. Skittles in...

Sun, 10 Aug 2008 21:29:18 -0400

Skittles was being pretty awesome this weekend.

Skittles in action (via catherine pickard)

Complaint #261

Fri, 08 Aug 2008 09:53:45 -0400

Hahahaha!

Our gym blasts “world class rock.” I wish they would lower the volume.

whitewhine:

“Why does my gym insist on blasting pop techno so loud over the speakers? Everyone has an iPod now anyways. “

-Whine by Joe Z

This is a little gem my brother found on YouTube. It’s...

Thu, 07 Aug 2008 09:24:00 -0400

This is a little gem my brother found on YouTube. It’s CBS’s 50th Anniversary special that aired in 1978. This part of the special was where they announced all the stars who performed on CBS shows. I was still three years from being born, but I watched a lot of these shows growing up (thanks Nick at Nite!). It’s pretty incredible just how much real talent CBS had back in the day.

Fun fact: my friend was taking a late train from NYC back to DC a few years ago and as she was going to her seat, she walked past Ed Bradley (RIP). Rather than just silently acknowledging him, she stopped and said “hey! You’re Ed Bradley!” To which he responded with an uninterested nod and went back to reading. I’m on Ed’s side with that one. It was like midnight and I think the poor guy just wanted to get where he was going.

Literacy!

Wed, 06 Aug 2008 19:21:43 -0400

Literacy!

hahaha!!! willschneider: Essentially, this is just a mean and...

Wed, 06 Aug 2008 12:40:45 -0400

hahaha!!!

willschneider:

Essentially, this is just a mean and confusing learning tool for little kids.

CrunchGear » Archive » Man builds Batman’s Tumbler in his garage

Wed, 06 Aug 2008 11:39:12 -0400

CrunchGear » Archive » Man builds Batman’s Tumbler in his garage: I am speechless. Wow.

Hello Cupcake!

Tue, 05 Aug 2008 11:42:39 -0400

Hello Cupcake!:

Ugh! The location in Dupont Circle is a short walk from my old apartment on Connecticut Ave. It opened almost right after I moved. That was probably for the best. Because if I had a cupcake bakery next door to me, there was no way I would have fit in my wedding dress.

CakeLove was also not that far from my apartment (okay, kind of far), but I never had to worry about craving those. I would go as far as to say that CakeLove’s cupcakes are disgusting. Dry and flavorless. How do you mess up a cupcake??

I have high hopes for Hello Cupcake. Tom, maybe we can do dinner in Dupont this weekend? Check out my old hood? Dessert at Hello Cupcake?